Ee-Shee-Shees!

Nora's current favorite food is Rice Krispies (aka Ee-Shee-Shees). She LOVES them! She would eat them for every meal if I would let her. :) Today she saw a picture of a Rice Krispies box in magazine and brought it to me so excited that she saw them. :)

It's Been Snowing

Ah, the weather-related Facebook statuses have been flying thick and furious this week. We have had quite a bit of... gasp! SNOW! Imagine that. Snow in Michigan. But yes, it is here. Quite a bit. Enough for a 4 year old to dearly long to get outside and play in it... but there is the Boots Problem for the Little One. Boots=Massive Tantrums... and thus the ruin of any fun in the excursion. It's tough with where we live- there aren't any windows to the front yard that make it easy to see what's going on, so I really can't leave her outside without being there... nor can I leave the Mischief Maker inside the house unattended... so it's a bit of a catch-22. I'm trying to dodge it by taking the girls to the pool as often as I can to leave their wiggles there. They are LOVING being able to play in the water. We don't even go to the interesting Y where there's a slide and a big kids area. It's just an ordinary indoor pool with a big step and those girls just love it. We all come out considerably less grouchy than we were when we came in. Oh joy! :)

Catching Up

Hello, blogosphere. I guess I've not done a great job at blogging lately... my best excuse is that it's been busy, and I've been grouchy! It's just been one of those weeks. I didn't have sunshiny pictures of my children to post... and I haven't felt like sitting down and blogging out my grouchies... so I didn't. I don't really have a good reason to be grumpy- I just feel like life in general is stressing me out and I've just been super irritable lately. I think the kids respond to me; they are both so in tune with how I'm feeling that at times they seem like little echoes of what is going on inside of me. I have felt a lot like this at times this week. [by the way, she is NOT hurt- she is just almost TWO and she does NOT like wearing boots- all three times we have attempted to go outside have been epic failures this week...]

But things are looking up. On Thursday, it kind of reached a fever pitch in our house with two little girls with lots of energy one mommy with strained nerves, and I resorted to desperate measures. I drove three miles down the road and joined our local YMCA. It was amazing what happened. I walked in the door, said I wanted to join, the kids ran right into the play area and spent a wonderful hour playing with a bunch of toys they don't have at home and a big slide and climbing area- and after I signed the papers, I spent a gloriously painful half-hour running on the treadmill- jogged 2 miles and (apparently) burned 200 calories I didn't need. :) The best part was that I did all this BY MYSELF and after a nice shower, I was so glad to spend time with the girls again and I felt like I was able to leave some of my stress there at the Y. Since we joined, we've been almost every day. Friday night we went as a family and checked out the awesome pool area and the girls just had a ball. It was so fun to see them enjoy themselves. Tomorrow Carolyn starts swimming lessons, and I'm super excited for her to get a chance to actually learn how to swim!

Last night Brad and I spent the night at the nice hotel in town and had a swanky dinner at my favorite seafood restaurant. It was so nice to be able to have time to get through the pleasantries, discussion of the weather, and generalized complaints about life- down to what really matters, to remember that one of the biggest reasons I married Brad was that I could talk to him for hours and not feel tired. He listens so well, and before I knew it more than 2 hours had passed at the restaurant. We got upgraded to the "concierge level" at the hotel because we were there to celebrate my birthday and got to enjoy the awesome view from the 23rd floor that night and again this morning for breakfast. It was lovely, and refreshing.

Back to real life again this week, hoping that my coping skills and organizational choices will be better this week. Setting and achieving reasonable expectations for myself as a parent, a wife, a homemaker, and a little business person is a challenge- one I need to step up to! Thanks Mom, for the great book on being a "creative counterpart." I've only read the first chapter, but I think it will definitely speak to where I am right now!

Significance, Intentionality, and Potty Training

What a mismatched group of words to describe a post... but it's what I'm thinking about tonight.

Significance. I think that stay-at-home moms often find themselves struggling with significance, and I've been in that place lately. The "honeymoon" period of leaving my behind-the-counter job for a much more behind-the-scenes one is past. The holiday rush of business making bows is done (a good thing because I think I would have started to really hate it if I'd stayed that busy!), the activities and trips of November and December are done, and my on-call work at the pharmacy seems to have dried up, as I thought it probably would. So here I am, sure beyond a shadow of a doubt that for this season in life God has me here at home with my children, making a life and a home for them and a place of refuge for my husband... and in my head I know that there is greater significance in this vocational choice than there would ever appear on the surface. But when it comes to the every day, day in, day out whining and tantrums and nap times and spills and body fluids, and still eating lunch standing up even though I'm not working in the pharmacy anymore- I've found myself craving the feedback of others around me to tell me I'm doing a good job.

When you work outside the home, at least to some extent you have real, quantifiable expectations to meet, and when you meet them, you have the satisfaction of a job well done. But the things that spell success in terms of raising children are a lot more subtle, and a lot more long-term than a day's work. So sometimes being a SAHM can feel like a really thankless job. Of course there's all the precious moments throughout the day... but if your attitude about the whole thing is lousy, then you miss them because they're just little glimmers in an otherwise bleak landscape of drudgery! I've felt that way this week. Just "off." And when I feel that way, I tend to get out of balance in other areas as well- and suddenly the success or failure of my day depends on how many bows I sell on my Etsy site. When I'm feeling less than significant in my home life, I tend to throw myself into that because it is so addictive to have that immediate feedback and pats on the back and at least a temporary feeling of awesomeness. But of course, it's deceptive and not healthy to throw too much into that... then the snowball effect starts and I end up totally miserable.

So that brings me to the next point in my title: Intentionality. That is my goal. For awhile, when we were immersed in the Growing Kids curriculum and taking weekly classes, we were really doing pretty well on that front, and you could really see it in the behavior of our kids and the happiness and health of our family over all... but one thing leads to another, and it's so easy to slide down into a reactive, rather than proactive way of living. And today I've realized that I've gone back to putting out whatever fire is the hottest at the moment, rather than pouring into my children and my family the very best that I have, and helping in the process to prevent the fires in the first place. The schedule we once had went completely out the window over the holidays, and with me working 6+ hours most days in November/December it was really hard to do much more than put out fires. But now we're back to "regular life" and I need to find a healthy way for Etsy to fit into my regular life rather than take it over, either by working on it all the time, or by thinking and/or worrying about it all the time. I don't want to miss these days with my girls, either by being too busy to enjoy them or by being too grouchy to really see the preciousness right in front of me. So starting tomorrow, we're back to a schedule. And, starting tomorrow, I am going to fill the Hours Of Havoc between 4 and 6pm with a gym membership and trying to get my now-30-something body in enough shape to run the Shamrock Shuffle with my family in April.

And finally the point that fits with none of the others except for the fact that it is something I'm thinking about today: Potty Training. Whew! I forgot how emotionally exhausting it can be! We were on the timer most of the day today taking Nora to the potty every 30 minutes. I wanted it to be a successful day for her today, and I think it was. She had a couple of accidents, but only one really gross one, and the rest of the time, she did awesome! She is so proud of herself for wearing big girl underwear- though she didn't like the vinyl pants that went over them (seriously, WHAT child is big enough to wear those? They would fit me, and they looked ridiculous on her!), so we ditched those partway through the day. So, she's on the potty train, and I'm excited to see this one pull out of the station. Can't believe we'll shortly be a mostly-diaper-free household (we won't try for nighttime for a while yet, so they'll stick around for her for awhile at night). Now all we need is a new tiny occupant and we'll be set to go... still praying on that one... sigh... guess maybe I need to get my house in order before we go adding to the craziness...

Milestone

30 years ago today... this is where I was. Looking at this picture, I know exactly what my mother was thinking at that moment... because I've had that exact same expression on my face twice now in my life... there are some really awesome things about being a mom, and one of them is that you know just exactly how much your own mother loves you.

I had a whole blog post planned out in my head, complete with video montage and really insightful things to say about leaving my 20s, turning 30, the brevity of life, and the faithfulness of God. But to be honest, it's been a really long, hard day. Not really so much because of the Birthday (though I've been dreading it for months), but just all the little annoyances of life that seemed to all stack up on top of each other (the tantrums, the whining, the DOG, etc, etc, etc)... and I think if I wrote the post now, it would be more about the inevitability of death than anything else, and who wants to read about that?! Hopefully I'll get a chance to write about what I really wanted to say because at least in my head it was really therapeutic to write about it as I pass this first of the Big Birthdays.

Yay for Potty Time

This could be a big week for Nora! We're going to make our first run at potty training this week! Nora has been very interested in the potty for awhile now, and she's been going at least a few times every day for the past week or two, so we're going to follow her interest and see where it goes. She is very excited about Big Girl Underwear and loves reading books in the bathroom- and she loves marshmallow treats after she is successful! I let her give her sister a treat every time, too, so Carolyn too is on board the potty train as an extra cheerleader! It's my birthday tomorrow, and I don't want to deal with the first day of potty training on my birthday, so we will start on Wednesday! Wish us luck!

2010 in Pictures

January: one of the girls' favorite times of each day is morning when they first greet each other with great big smiles and happy squeals. As the year has gone one, Carolyn is turning into a "late sleeper," and the first thing Nora wants to do every morning is to run into her sister's room and wake her up!

Also January: girls' trip to Chicago to see "Annie!" Carolyn just put her fingers in her nose for the picture.  ;)

February: Nora turns one!

Also February: new TV that we love! :)

March: We have some really special beautiful pictures taken that I will always love.

Also March: Ear Infection Week...
Thanking goodness for good drugs that take Miss Carolyn from tears to grins in just a day or two!

April: Beautiful girls in their beautiful Easter dresses.

Also April: A little window into what my living room actually looks like on Laundry Day- might give you a clue as to why I put it off for as long as possible each time!

May: Carolyn's dance recital. She was so proud of herself and so excited to be all dolled up... made me think about what she'll be like in 10 (or 20 ;)) years getting ready for her first dance. :) I hope she always sees herself as this beautiful- because she is!

Also May: Nora's early days as a model for My Little Pixies. I still use this photo in every listing I have for Nora Bows!

June: the family "stay-cation" we didn't plan and didn't want to take, but my treatment for our ectopic pregnancy/miscarriage/giant ovarian cyst forced us to stay close to home for the weekend we were supposed to get to spend in Door County Wisconsin. We tried very hard to regroup and make it a special weekend together with the girls... but are very much hoping for a better outcome next time we see two little lines on a stick!

Also June: Carolyn turns four!

July: Nephew and Cousin Elliot Scheffers is born- while we happen to be in Chicago and get to hold him when he is hours old!

Also July: wonderful Blueberry pictures sum up one of the best parts of summer for us: fresh fruit and beautiful girls. :)

August: Doug, Katy, Emily, and Jake come visit at Nana and Papa's "beach house."

Also August: we love watching "Prince Naveen" and friends visit our hummingbird feeder. It was one of the highlights of each meal, and we are so looking forward to being able to get it out again when the weather gets nice again!

September: Cruise too Alaska! Sometimes I still can't believe we actually did it. It was a wonderful trip, full of beautiful things, restful times, and a great time to reconnect with each other. Also, I love cruising. :) I hope we are cruising old people some day.

Also September: Carolyn starts preschool at Jenison Christian, which has been a wonderful place for her! Her teachers are great, the other families are awesome, and she has learned and grown so much from being there three mornings a week. I'm so proud of her and all that she is learning.

October: our new minivan! (aka The Hoopty) :)

November: All the Irving cousins (and their families) converge on Nana and Papa's house in South Carolina.

Also November: Thanksgiving in Texas- these are ALL the cousins, all grown up now. :)

December: sweet sisters, the light of our lives, and the best gifts we have ever received.

Happy New Year from our family to yours. May 2011 be a year of beauty for all. :)