Happy Birthday Carolyn!

This morning Carolyn got to blow out more candles- on her chocolate chip pancakes! :) We had a fun birthday (except for the hour-long meltdown she had after breakfast) and I just really enjoyed soaking her wonderfulness in today. Thought some of you might like to read what I wrote about her in honor of her second birthday... so if you're in the mood for something long, by all means, read ahead! :) Or just stay tuned this week- Doug and Katy and Emily are in town and I've got some cute pictures to post when I'm not so tired! :) It's late and time for bed! Dear Little Miss Carolyn
I can scarcely believe that it has been two years since I first held you, heard your cry for the first time as you let the whole room know how you felt about being out of your safe, warm little nest inside my tummy, how I knew right from the very first minute that a dream was coming true for me- a dream that turned out to be infinitely more abundantly wonderful than I could ever have asked for or even imagined. I loved everything about you right from the start- that crazy mop of black hair that is long gone now, replaced with your beautiful blondish sheet of gold reaching already halfway down your back- I loved the way your eyes looked right into mine as if you were trying even from those first minutes to discover who I was- I loved how your newborn body just nestled right in next to me, as if you knew on some deep level that you were safe with me. Having you was one of the really greatest experiences of my whole life.

And now you are two! Gone forever is that little baby who stole my heart and took over my living room- there are times I miss that small stage- but mostly, you are just a TON of fun now that you are TWO! I think two is going to be more Terrific than Terrible. :) I love how you talk to me now so fluently and tell me all about the world from your perspective. I thought it might be fun for you (and me!) to look back someday on what you are like at two years old, so here are some of the things I've learned about you. Daddy and I had a fun time when we went out to dinner for our anniversary thinking of some of our favorite things about you! :)

Things You Can Do Now
-Feed yourself with spoon and fork
-Speak in sentences
-Say your ABCs and count to 10
-Walk run, climb
-Go down a slide by yourself
-Say all the words to many of your favorite books
-Go on the potty! (sometimes)

Favorite Things You Say:
-OTZ! now has become the whole family's word for "YES!"
-Mommy sing... A children... Zaccheus... Be Cah-foo Eyes (you now request you favorite songs)
-Daddy Come! at the end of the day, when it is time for your Bible story and prayer time, you always yell for Daddy to come so that we can worship together as a family.
-Ah-You? where are you... followed often by "It Is!" in the most adorable squeaky voice when you've found what you're looking for
-Thank you God for... food... dis day, etc. We love watching you learn to pray
-Lord-ah-trus-You- at the end of our prayers we often say "Lord we trust You"- funny how you're picking up on that even from this young age
-Mommy hind you- Mommy behind you- you no longer like me to push you from in front when you're swinging- you want me to do it from behind!
-I be hurt/I be cold- I love the mixed up grammar you use! :)
-Daddy Gitchu! You love for your Daddy to chase you! :)

Things You Love
-Spaghetti, pizza, berries, cookies, broccoli, cucumbers (with Daddy's nasty green salad dressing)
-The park with ducks, swing (you especially like DIS swing, which is usually the one on the left since the other swing is "Isaiah's Swing" even if he isn't with us). :)
-The Mouse and Puppy movies (Ratatouille and 101 Dalmatians), Veggie Tales
-Songs: Jesus Loves the Little Children, Zaccheus, O Be Careful Little Eyes, Wheels on the Bus, Jesus Loves Me
-Your Bible- you love to look for all the pictures of Jesus
-Baby Motrin and Tylenol- you sometimes tell me that you are getting molars or you have fevers in an effort to get some :)
-Mommy Draw A Baby- a game we play on the Magnadoodle where I draw a baby and you tell me if it's happy or sad or crying or whatever and usually you say sad and crying and want to give the baby lots of pipes. :)
-Helping Mommy cook and "making suffing" in your own kitchen.
-Being outside, especially in the pool
-Baggins, who is finally starting to tolerate you :)

Who You Are at Two:
-You are very warm and affectionate, love hugs and being close- but don't like being confined!
-You are unusually empathetic and compassionate for someone your age: you always seem to have a "radar" for other people who are hurting around you and want to comfort them.
-You are really growing in independence and this great drive to do things by yourself. Sometimes getting shoes on is quite an ordeal because you want to do it yourself but don't quite have the manual dexterity to do it- and, I suppose, we are too often in a hurry! One of my goals for this year needs to be to slow us down some!
-Although you have been generally a pretty compliant child, we are starting to see a bit of a stubborn streak- when you decide that you want to put your little foot down about something, there is just nothing that's going to move you! This will serve you well later in life... but does make life a bit hard at times when what you want isn't good for you and I have to say no!
-You have always been ahead of your peers in language development. I have loved that you're an early talker because it gave me a window into your world earlier than a lot of parents get one. We're really impressed with how good your memory and comprehension levels are!
-You're very social- generally more interested in the people in a room than the toys or other objects there.
-You don't really seem to crave the "stage" or the limelight of a large group of people- you're often shyer in a group than you are with a small number of people you know well. But you just light up with the affection and admiration of the people who really matter in your life. And dear one, you are so extravagantly loved!

Carolyn, I hope someday you enjoy reading about yourself at this really exciting stage in life. I know we are in for a wild, fun ride from two to three and I'm excited!! I am so blessed to be your mommy. All my love,
Mommy

Birthday Party!

On Saturday we had a birthday party for Carolyn. We brought the balloons into her room for a special birthday wake-up treat. :)
The birthday girl and her sweet smile! The dark spot on her arm is her first "tattoo"- of "The Mouse" (from Ratatouille)- she was thrilled! :)
According to long-standing Barton family tradition, my dad frosted the cake.
Here's the finished masterpiece- Remy the rat- Carolyn's favorite character (she watches hardly any tv, except almost daily she views at least part of The Mouse- and even though she's seen it about a hundred times, she is still completely glued to it and it is clearly the highlight of her day- and mine, too- as we usually save this treat for when I want to make dinner! :))
Present opening didn't go quite as smoothly as we'd expected- she liked opening the presents but was very distracted by her beloved Bible. Once she gets into it, it's almost impossible to divert her into anything else- she especially loves to point out Jesus in all the pictures and always points out Zaccheus and demands to sing the song about the "wee little man.")
Here comes the cake!
She actually managed to blow out her own candles. :)
The cake met with a great reception!
Yum yum!
Nana and Papa got Carolyn this great wagon- we walked to church yesterday and she looked like the little princess sitting in her chariot. Also note the small yellow bag- her very own bag made by Ammy to take to church- just the right size for a diaper and a few necessities- and small enough for her to carry by herself. She loves it!
It was great to see the family all together and celebrate this sweet young lady who has brought so much joy to us all. We have Party Take Two tonight- Doug and Katy and Emily are in town this week and next and we're celebrating with them tonight. :)

Big Girl!

She's ready to hit Michigan Avenue! :) We brought Carolyn's new stroller to the mall last week and she had such a fun time pushing it around all over the place. She scored some sunglasses with her kids' meal for lunch and insisted on wearing them (upside down :)) inside.

Speaking of being a big girl... this week the Pipes are making a much planned and prepared-for exit, much to Miss Carolyn's dismay. We actually put them in an envelope and mailed them "to the babies" (care of my mother :)) yesterday- made a big deal about it and what a big girl she is and how sweet of her to share with "the babies", and this morning "the babies" sent Carolyn a special present under her bed for being such a brave girl about it all. I thought this would be the best way to do it- just to get it over with once and for all on a week where I'm not working and we can just readjust at home- but if I hadn't actually physically mailed them away I'm afraid I might have caved since the resistance has been at least as strong as I'd anticipated and has affected me emotionally even more than I thought it would. She cries so piteously for the Pipes every time I put her to bed that I feel as though I've caused her irreversible psychological damage! If I didn't think it would ultimately make things worse, I'd go out and buy some more today! But I know it is time for her to take this step into Big Girl Land. I just grieve with her over her very real sadness. I wish she had some way of understanding how much it breaks my heart to hear her cry like that- I feel like she thinks I'm doing this on purpose to make her miserable (I am sure that this is not the last time I will feel like this!)

I don't know if it's to do with the Pipes or the fact that I worked all day for 3 days straight or what, but the last 3 days have been just miserable ones for us. Carolyn has been crying at the drop of a hat and misbehaving almost constantly all morning- I feel like a total and complete failure as a mom. Maybe she's teething or something or maybe it's just being Almost Two... but the whole Toddler Angst thing has dramatically increased in the past few weeks and hit a real crisis point in the last few days. She's throwing things, hitting, pinching, hurting people and things on purpose and generally having a really nasty attitude about things. She does things she knows she shouldn't do and then looks at me as if to say- "well, what are YOU going to do about it!" It takes no time at all for her to go from being pretty happy to an all-out screaming fit! We had to cut her off from Youtube because she protests so intensely when it is time to turn it off. I just don't know what to do.We've tried our best to respond with appropriate, loving, consistent discipline, but I just feel like I'm not getting anywhere.

Maybe I'm being too soft and not consistent enough because a lot of this behavior just doesn't make sense to me- I know there's something behind it motivating her to act out like this, but I can't figure it out. She's so small that I feel like when we discipline her it needs to be for actions she can clearly understand and identify- like when she hits or throws something- but what about all the other times when she just acts inappropriately and someone needs to teach her that it is not okay to behave like that but "like that" just isn't an easily definable thing- it isn't that she isn't allowed to be disappointed or express frustration, but that there are more appropriate ways to do it than screaming and hitting and throwing? Or what if I'm missing something big that's going on with her- like at Christmas when I thought she was being really defiant and it turned out that she was just in pain but couldn't express it.

They tell you that being a parent is hard... but somehow in moments like this I'm almost surprised by how hard it actually is. I feel so clueless. I love that little child more than she will ever understand until she holds a little one of her own. I would do anything for her. But I'm afraid I'm not doing well with the most important job I'll ever have. I feel at a loss to know how to show her love and limits because BOTH are important- demonstrating limits is an essential part of love because it is this time of learning boundaries that will teach her essential things about living in a world with others. But she also needs to know that she is loved completely and unconditionally no matter how naughty she is. I just feel so mixed up that I'm not sure I'm sending her the clear messages that she needs. Heaven help me! I certainly don't feel up to this huge task- how in the world did You entrust ME with something so precious when I am almost sure to mess up so many many times?!

Party! Party!

On Wednesday we had a party to celebrate the birthdays of Rachel, Caimon, Carolyn, and Aidan. If you haven't been following our blog for long, you might not know that all their birthdays are within 2 weeks of each other and all us mommies met in a nursing support group through the hospital where we all gave birth. We've been getting together every week since our kids were just a few weeks old! It has been so fun to watch them all grow up alongside each other, growing into such wonderful individuals!
I can't believe how much more Aidan looks like his "little boy" self than he did as a baby. He has enough personality for the entire group! We are always laughing at his antics.
Here are Caimon and Rachel. Caimon loves to smile and look pretty for the camera. Her hair has grown so much longer this year! And Rachel has the most beautiful little ringlet curls now.
I love this picture of Carolyn. I'm so frequently amazed by the intensity with which she does things and also the flawlessness of her skin- too bad I can't bottle that. I'd make a fortune!
We grilled out hot dogs and chicken and kept the kids happy with fruit and chips while the meat cooked.
The cupcakes were a hit, though it turned out to be too windy to light the candles.
Already Carolyn has a deep and abiding love for cupcakes. :)
The sugar went straight to her head and she ended up in a fit of giggles over them. :)
It doesn't get any cuter than this. :)
After lunch and cupcakes we had presents. We drew names so each of us bought for just one kid and everyone got just one present- it turned out to be a great idea.
Aidan gave Carolyn this adorable Maclaren doll stroller. It was a big hit!! He wanted very much to go over the finer points of its usage, but Carolyn was immediately possessive of her new toy... we decided we couldn't blame her- it really is amazingly cute! And I think there's a good chance Aidan will get one for his birthday, too. :)
Caimon also got a doll stroller and they had a lot of fun pushing them around the grass.
Thanks girls, for being my friends, for sharing your lives and your children with me! You have blessed my life in more ways than you know!

The Monkey

So, a wise person I respect (and the mother of 7 children!) suggested to me that when her kids started climbing out of the crib, she just made sure they could do it safely and put off the big kid bed until they were older. The crib is in some ways so much more convenient. So yesterday (camera in hand) I asked Carolyn to show me how she got out of the crib. And this is how she did it- though obviously without me spotting her to be sure she didn't fall. I'm not sure I really want her monkeying around like this in her bed without me there to catch her!



For the short term, we lowered the side of the crib so it is an easier climb out and a shorter fall. We are strategically exiting the pacifiers next week and I think it may be too many changes at once to move to a new bed AND get rid of the pipes. She didn't even try to escape last night... so we may be able to put off the new bed for a little while longer. But it is surely not too far in the future! Our baby girl is growing up!!

Help! I have a monkey on my hands!

We need some advice! We have a little escape artist on our hands! We've known for awhile that she was getting close... last night, she did it! I peeked in her room to check on her and found her standing next to the crib, quietly saying, "Mommy hold you!" That little monkey had managed to climb right out of the crib! What do we do? Now that I know she can get out... should I run out today and buy a big girl bed? Or just wait it out a little longer and hope she doesn't get hurt trying to climb out again? What to do, what to do?! I know we lose a major advantage once she's no longer in a crib... but now that she can get out, maybe we've lost it already? I'm afraid she could fall in her escape efforts. Advice please! What should we do?

A First

Well, yesterday we had a first in our family- Carolyn fell down at the playground and somehow cut her chin badly enough to need stitches. I took her to see Daddy at work so that we could eliminate the need for someone at the urgent care center to roll their eyes at me and give me a "first time mom" badge for my forehead because I overreacted. Unfortunately I didn't overreact and she did indeed need stitches. We ended up taking her downstairs to the ER at Daddy's hospital so that he could stay with us. Of course I never go anywhere without my pocket camera so we decided to document the experience. :) In my experience, it has often lightened the mood considerably when something un-fun is happening to try to take pictures and think of how much fun it will be to smile over it when it's all over.
Carolyn had to wear a "sticker" with some numbing solution on it for 15 minutes. We had a challenge keeping her hands away from it.
She likes it when Mommy sings "Jesus Loves Me." I love that already at such a young age, Carolyn already knows such an important lesson of life- one that I hope she never forgets, just as my mother taught me and I have never quite forgotten, even in the hard times in life, that Jesus loves me.

There are no pictures of what happened after this... because we would all like to forget it! They wrapped her all up in a sheet to keep her still, and Daddy held her head and I held her little body still while the doctor put in three stitches that seemed to take FORever!
Eventually it was done, and the nurse won Carolyn's forgiveness (and our eternal gratitude) by giving her a popsicle. :) She kept licking it and saying "I like that!"
What a great place for an impromptu family photo. :) It was a family bonding experience.
I caught a rare moment of sweetness- Daddy cuddling his little girl, making her know that she is safe in his arms and that he will always be there for her. Who knew an ER visit would carry so many life lessons. :)
After it was all over, Brad "bought" us lunch in the hospital cafeteria (they give him a far greater food stipend than he ever uses, being frequently too busy to eat much at work) and Carolyn kept telling us that she had a "beard." :) I took this picture to show her what it looks like. :)

All in all, she was a little trooper and even Mommy did okay (I only cried a little!) Now we have to be careful to keep it covered with a Band Aid (I heard a lot about stickers today!) and Neosporin and have the stitches taken out in a week. We survived our first trip to the ER! What a blessing it wasn't for anything more serious!

After the Rain

We have had some rather unusual June weather the past few days. It was just a couple weeks ago we were still having 40 degree days so it seems really unfair that we should so quickly be thrust into the humid near-90-degree heat. I think everyone who lives in Michigan would quickly admit that we paid our dues this year with a horrible winter and are therefore entitled to a really nice summer! Perhaps it's a plot by the weathermen so that they have something to talk about on TV, but we've had two days of hot weather and severe thunderstorms in the afternoon. After the latest one, we decided to take an impromptu little walk and I was glad that I had the foresight to bring the camera along! Who would have known that a simple walk around the neighborhood would afford such great picture opportunities! :) It helps to have a beautiful subject and an awesome piece of equipment. :) Hope you enjoy these pictures...
Happy little girl- glad to be outside! I guess I should have thought to put shoes on her feet but I didn't think we'd make it any farther than 2 or 3 houses down the street! I wasn't wearing shoes either and it didn't seem too uncomfortable and she was having fun so I didn't make a big deal out of it...
She wanted to bend over and look at all the things in the cracks and crevices in the sidewalk.
She also liked to pretend to be flying and sing the "soaring" song we learned in Kindermusik.
Here she inspects an inchworm that was squeeging its way across the sidewalk. I love the look of intense concentration on her face when she encounters something new. What a blessing to see the world through the new eyes of a child!
There- I caught it! A moment where she looks just like her daddy to me! There is something about this face that is wholly NOT me! Carolyn does have two parents! :)
Hurrah for fun walks!

The Pool!

Friday we had our playgroup and it was SO hot and humid there wasn't anyplace better to be than the pool! Heather's neighborhood has a community pool so it worked out great! All the kids (and us too!) had a wonderful time. Carolyn keeps telling me "wan-go-simmin pool!" (I want to go swimming in the pool) Caimon is a little fishie! She makes her mama nervous because she likes to put her head under the water- and doesn't seem a bit afraid when Lenore pulls her up spluttering! Aidan got a little cold at the end but obviously enjoyed himself. :)
Rachel's hair makes the cutest little curls when it's wet.
Practicing for her future days of beaching. :)
Four little friends... virtually impossible to get them all to look at the camera and be in the same place at the same time. :)

Playgroup Pictures

On Friday we had pictures taken of our little playgroup. The people at JC Penney remembered us from last year when we brought the chocolate cake in! :) Who could forget that? Certainly not us-we went for a more simple arrangement this year and got about as good of results as would be expected with 4 almost-two-year-olds! :) Here are my three favorites. :)



Carolyn has such a cute little pouty face- she rarely cracks a real smile for the camera when we're in an actual studio- but she's still adorable.

Escape to Traverse City!

This weekend we got to have a very special getaway. Ammy and Papa and Laura and Jon pitched in to take care of Carolyn for the weekend, and we went up to Traverse City with our friends Matt and Katie (Katie's parents watched their 8-month-old twins, bless them!). Confident that our children were in great hands, we thoroughly enjoyed two days without high chairs, bottles, throwing food, or temper tantrums. It was wonderfully refreshing and we were glad to be home with fresh energy for being good parents. :)

On Saturday it was supposed to be rainy all day, but we turned out to have quite a nice morning, though it could have been a touch warmer. We went out to a winery and wandered around outside for awhile, then went inside and enjoyed listening to a man who was truly passionate about the wine he sells.
Again, I just had to love my new camera over and over. The pictures I can take with it are so much better than what I could take with my other one!
After we visited the vineyard, we went to see a lighthouse and explore a bit on the beach.
We took a walk out on this little piece of land sticking out into the water, almost like a pier, but land instead of boards. There were lots of little pools and pretty grasses growing.
My love. We enjoyed spending some quality time alone together, too. It was a great reminder that we are still husband and wife, though we are also many other things now.
Brad was very interested in the large swarms of flying insects. :)
About when we got out as far as you could go without going swimming, the sky started to look like rain. We headed back quickly to avoid being drenched, but on the way, I had to marvel at how beautiful the sky and the lake look, with all the colors coming together like a painting by a master artist.
We were so thankful for this little getaway and are already working on plans for another trip together- with the kids next time! What great friends!