The Birthday

So today my baby girl turned four. Can't believe it, but here we are. Today I spent most of the day just celebrating with her and trying to give her a really good day; I let Nora pick up an extra day at school so I could just focus on Carolyn.

We went to the salon to get "pedicures" (aka polish changes that cost 1/4 of the amount of a "real" pedicure but still have the effect of walking out of the place with colorful toes :))

Carolyn actually really seemed to enjoy the foot bath. :) Her new birthday Barbie fairy doll (thanks Rachel! :)) did too.

The gal who did her feet also does "nail art" so Carolyn was thrilled with the splurge to get flowers painted on her big toes.

We're going a bit of a non-traditional route and giving Carolyn her birthday presents from our immediate family at the gathering we're having on Saturday for her with everybody. She had a friend birthday party today and we didn't want to inundate her with stuff all on the same day; also gift opening is stressful enough with a room full of 4-year-olds without adding anything more to it. But Carolyn did get to open one present this morning from us- a twirling dress with some REAL twirl to it! She loved it all day long! I think this might become a tradition (the giving of a special dress to the Birthday Girl on her Birthday). Anyway, she loved twirling in the dress in front of Logan's (aka the Peanut Restaurant), her choice for lunch today.

Following lunch, she requested a trip to the mall play area and thoroughly enjoyed herself. Then I thought I'd cross something off my own list as well and I went to visit the tail end of the semi-annual sale at Gymboree... guess that was my mistake. In what I sincerely hope does not become a birthday tradition, Carolyn there staged the Birthday Meltdown of the Century. I haven't seen her literally on the floor kicking and screaming in public since she was about two. The other people at the mall were giving me high fives as I struggled out with my kicking and screaming child, headed (obviously), for my award ceremony for Parent of the Year. No really, no one gave me a high five. In fact, most people tried really hard to look the other way. :) Following meltdown cleanup time when we got home, Carolyn actually did take a nap, which was good because we PARTIED tonight. :)

There were balloons this afternoon for decoration and fun. :)

Nora liked them very much, too. She kept pointing and saying "BOON!"

And then the chaos started. Seven four-year-olds, two of their parents, and two smaller siblings filled our house to bursting. It was a little frenzied at times, but overall, I think everyone had fun. The fun fairy wings I bought on Etsy were a hit, and I made my own wands for party favors.

The kids had a crazed "treasure hunt" out in the back yard. Basically a re-run of the Easter egg hunt, and overall, fun.

There were a few tears over who got what, but after they all forgot about it, I divvied it up fairly so they all went home with roughly the same amount of goodies. :) I found a new store at the mall that has lots of 25 cent and 10 cent cute little rings and stuff and so I got a lot of fun little prizes for not very many dollars and that made me happy. :)

And then we had cake. And then presents (again chaos), and then we were about 45 minutes into the party, so we let them loose in the basement. :) Good thing I didn't make the party longer! It was fun, but now I'm tired and ready to relax!

Four Years

Every year the hospital where Brad trained and where he is now an attending has a big shindig to welcome the new interns and residents at the local go-kart joint/arcade/pretend casino for kids. It's always a lot of fun and a favorite event of each year. It's fun to see how the kids grow from year to year in the pictures. There are always a lot of pregnant women there since I guess it's sort of the time of life... or maybe I'm just extra conscious because I really wish I was one of them again... sigh... but four years ago I sure was!!
This is me and my doctor at the same party on June 28, 2006- just two days before we met Miss Carolyn. Dr. Florido was expecting her son Christian who's a few days younger than Carolyn (he was just waiting for her to show up so his mommy could do my delivery :))

That night I was SO ready to have that baby OUT that I tried very hard to induce labor by picking up all my own mini-golf balls. I'm not sure it was really that effective... but the next picture on my camera looks like this:

And not (too) long after that came this picture:

So it is true that no pregnancy lasts forever... even if it seems like it. That's for you, Michelle. :) Just 5 more weeks til my nephew is due! :) Can't wait to meet him. :)

And tomorrow we celebrate four years of parenthood, four years of wonder and joy and blessing that is Carolyn Ann. I updated her slide show today while I smelled her cake baking and thought how FAST four years have gone. It seems like she's always been part of my life... and yet in some other ways it seems like that moment of holding brand new life and falling in a love so deep and permanent and life altering... was just yesterday.

Park Bench

Yesterday we had our annual combined birthday celebration for our big kids. Rachel was still recovering from the flu, so she sadly couldn't be there. :( But the other kids had fun. I wish she'd have been able to be in this picture because it turned out really cute!

I liked the light and the look of the kids sitting on the bench, so I took this picture of my own two once Nora figured out how to walk up the little hill leading to the table. :)

And once she figured out how to walk up the hill, she discovered it is even more fun to walk DOWN the hill. :)

I'm working on a post right now in my head about all the stuff that has been going on for the past 6 weeks. I'm feeling overall a lot better, but still struggling with the whole thing on some level, and sometimes it gets a little overwhelming. I had another blood test yesterday and was really hoping to get a ZERO so I could post some sort of victorious wrap-up post. I got a 2.4, and while the medical people in my life see that as sort of the "same" as zero (my doctor said less than ten means no more blood tests), it just didn't feel that way to me since there must still be "something" there to make it anything at all. I was really expecting and hoping for some real closure to all of this so that maybe I can find a way to make some sense out of everything that has happened. I felt cheated, and so instead of blogging last night as I'd intended to about grace in the storm (from the retrospective perspective of someone who's put down the umbrella because the rain's stopped), I had a meltdown and cried on my couch.

Maybe I will come up with some way to tie the whole thing up with a little bow... or maybe I'm just gonna deal with this for awhile and it never will sort out in a way that makes sense to me. I wish I could just forget it all happened and throw it in a box in the attic and get on with my life as if nothing happened and look forward with hope to a few months from now when trying again can become part of the story. But somehow I don't think I'm going to get to do that. I think one way or another I'm going to just have to keep slogging through it all until one day I look around to find myself on the other side of it. And it's not going to be done until it's done. I hope that somehow I'm a better person when it's all behind me.

A Fun Weekend

Friday afternoon we looked at each other and asked what we had going on this weekend. It's almost unheard of in our house, but we actually had NOTHING planned!! And it turned out to be a great weekend. We did some playing and some resting and a very little bit of tidying up and it was fun. :)

Saturday morning we took the girls to the Frederick Meijer Gardens to play in the children's garden. It was ferociously hot, but we had a good time anyway. Here Carolyn is in a "cave" pretending to be a bear. This is her "put the camera away NOW Mom" face.

Nora is quickly learning not to look at me when I have that Thing out. :) But... even if I hadn't been taking pictures I'm not sure if she'd have given me the time of day... she was so intent on the sand.

Highlight for the girls is always the water feature where they can play with boats in the model of the Great Lakes.

I'm not sure there's a whole lot of education going on at this point... but they sure have a good time! And we've learned by now to always bring extra clothes. :)

Family Night Meltdown

We took the kids out to Jersey Junction tonight for ice cream. Had visions of playing with them at the park by Reed's Lake and having a pleasant family evening reminiscing about East Grand Rapids and how we used to go there all the time. Now that Nana and Papa moved to South Carolina, we don't get to go very much anymore. Tonight we didn't really make it past the ice cream place... for obvious reasons.

Nora is going through a fiercely independent phase. She was SO offended that I had taken the spoon from her (in order to scoop up some more ice cream for her to eat... my almost-not-20-something-anymore-hands being slightly more coordinated than her 16-month-old ones)- that she instantly burst into tears. I'm surprised the people around us didn't call CPS because the way she was crying you'd think we were torturing her!! And then of course to top it all, we TOOK A PICTURE. Because really, it was sort of funny. How'd we get such INTENSE kids? [Mom, you don't have to answer...]

Nora wasn't the only one with (multiple) meltdowns tonight... a little peace and quiet on the way home was a welcome end to Family Meltdown Night. Next time we'll go somewhere closer to home when the naps have been lacking during the day! :)

Summer Fun

Today we had some good old-fashioned summer fun in the front yard. Fudgesicles were involved, obviously. :) Carolyn didn't want me to take her picture eating her Fudgesicle, but Nora made enough of a mess for both of them.

The pool was the perfect place to slurp them down. Our neighborhood is sort of funny- all the houses are really pretty and nice houses, manicured lawns, etc... but it's overall a pretty "young" neighborhood, so when the weather gets nice, all the brightly colored kid stuff gets hauled out of garages and people set up their blow-up pools in their front yards- ruining the aesthetics of the neighborhood maybe, but having fun all the same. :) Often we'll run over to the neighbors' if their pool is up, and sometimes they'll come over here. The kids just sort of drift from house to house, wherever the cool stuff is out. It's fun living here in the summer. I think there are quite a lot of SAHMs in the neighborhood as well as working moms- it'll be fun to be around more later this summer and maybe I will get to know some of them.

Anyway, Carolyn didn't want me to take her picture eating her Fudgesicle, but she did want me to photograph her running down our little hill to splash into the pool. I took several. :)

This one's my favorite; even got Nora's reaction as she splashes into the water.

Overall, I think the Fudgesicles were a hit. :)

Carolyn "helped" her sister clean off.

Then Mommy got out some bubbles and that was a whole new cycle of fun. Carolyn likes blowing the bubbles and then running all around trying to catch them.

I call this Nora's "ugly face." Can you hear the whine/scream that goes along with it? This is what she does when she wants something REAL bad. Communication skills are improving, but overall, she still has trouble getting her thoughts across... earlier today she was very vocally upset because she kept yelling "OCK! OCK! OCK!" and it took me several minutes to realize that she was asking for a fork. She was all smiles after she got it.

She also makes many other happier faces... this one is HAPPY FACE. Apparently she was pleased. I can't remember what she was so happy about. Likely the fact that I was allowing her to play with the bubble container and wand. She doesn't really like it when someone else blows bubbles, because although she loves the bubbles, she prefers to hold the wand.

She can't really blow bubbles yet, but she makes a great "blowy face."

And she's sure cute, huh?

Big sister's pretty cute, too. I love taking pictures of her looking down at the camera like this. It's a fun way to see her pretty face. :)

She's really big enough to enjoy blowing bubbles this year. I love how her cheeks puff out like that.

And now when she blows, bubbles really come out. This makes her really happy. :)

Look Mommy! I blew a bubble on your camera! Good thing I have insurance on it so I don't worry so much about stuff like that. :)

No afternoon's complete without a sister picture attempt. I like this one because it captures how they feel about each other.

And finally, Nora was D-O-N-E, so we went inside. And that was that. :)

Duck Duck GOOSE!

Last night we had a little extra time so we took the girls to the park to run off some energy. Somehow it turned into a family game of Duck Duck Goose. Carolyn was so excited to play- she loved "ducking" the little black pedestals we were sitting on and announcing loudly "GOOOOOOSE!" to the chosen one, who then had the pleasure of chasing her around the park before returning to the seats.

Another little girl joined our impromptu game and she was a little more advanced on the mechanics of DDG... Somewhere in Carolyn's instructions for how to play the game she seemed to miss the idea that the "Goose" has to try to tag the "Ducker" while the "Ducker" attempts to steal the "Goose's" seat... Carolyn just kept running even when she was tagged... But we all had fun. :)

And little Nora just sat on the stool and watched. :)

Shoes

Whenever it gets a little too quiet in our house and we wonder where Nora is, the first place we now check is the bucket of shoes near the door (the bathroom is SO 2009 :)) She is just obsessed with shoes- specifically taking them off and attempting to put them back on again (and of course tasting them).

Tonight we took a family trip to the park and she hid out in the tunnel taking her shoes off as often as Daddy would put them back on. Eventually, she lost the privilege of playing in the tube anymore. :) I can't put shoes on her feet in the car, and even at day care now she is the only child in her room who does not wear shoes except when outside!

I will take this opportunity to document some of the funny things the kids are saying. Here are some Carolyn quotes.

-Mommy, my "nickel" hurts! [she has a "skebeeto bite" on her chest and thinks it is a "nickel." :)

-Carolyn, where did your angry heart go? "Jesus took my angry heart away!

Nora's vocab seems to be hitting that "explosion" stage- she seems to pick up a new (understandable word) nearly every day. She probably has about 30 intelligible words now. Some of my favorites are "buh-boo" (bubble), "Nowah" (Nora), "Coh-ren" (Carolyn), BOH! (bow, also book), and BAAAAAH! (bath).

Sure is fun raising these little sweeties. :)

Toy Story 3

When Carolyn was at my parents' house for a little "vacation" a few weeks ago, they introduced her to the wonderful world of Toy Story. I've heard about it over and over every day since then, and her interest seems to be well timed since the new movie came out last week. Today we found ourselves without anything planned this afternoon, Brad was off, there was no one in labor, so we went, all together, as a family! A first for us... Carolyn's been to a movie before, but Nora never has, and we've never done it all together.

Carolyn was very excited to see the sign and pointed out all the characters. She didn't want to take sunglasses off. I think she wore them through most of the movie.

The best part was after it was all done and the credits were rolling. We were sitting right at the front where we could (and did) make an easy escape with Nora, so when the movie was over, Carolyn jumped down from her seat and treated us all to an interpretive dance to the credit music. :) I had to take a couple pictures, once the theater cleared out and I was sure I wouldn't disturb anyone with my flash. I love having a purse camera; the pictures are never "great" quality, but at least I don't miss the precious moments that are my life.

Carolyn loves to try to "dance" with Nora, but Nora is in a "don't hold me" phase right now, and she also doesn't have the balance at 16 months that Carolyn does at almost 4, so these dancing sessions usually end with Nora on the floor crying. We broke this one up before it got there.

Nora did really well through the movie; she really seemed to enjoy about the first hour of it. But the movie is relatively long for small children and she and I spent about the last 15 minutes walking up and down the little hall inside the theater but away from where she'd disturb people. She was very, very happy to come and do her own dancing (and scavenging of popcorn) after the credits started.

We've had a bit of rough waters around here discipline-wise lately with all that has been going on, and it was fun tonight to just make Carolyn really happy. I love that smile, and seeing it reminds me again of how worth it all the un-fun moments are. This child (both of them of course!) is so infinitely precious that to give her anything less than our very best is a waste of God's most precious gift.